Sakura Shower
by sakimidare
Summary: Because the world needs more crack. Pfft, I wish. Series of crack drabbles with different pairings. 1869, 2759, DS, 186927, 1827.#6: In which Mukuro decides to stick to un-matchmaking things. Dino/Squalo, Hibari/Mukuro/
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Because the world needs more crack.**

**I **_**wish.**_

**This is a series of KHR crack drabbles. Pairings you'll find here will include: 1869, 2759, DS(in the next chappie that's already been written out), DaemonElena.**

**And might include: GiottoG, 10069.**

**Pairings in this drabble: 1869.**

**Why Hibari Decided to Cut Off Mukuro's Hair**

At the first glance, there was absolutely nothing wrong with it.

In fact, if you caught Hibari in one of his rare tender moments, you might have gotten him to admit what was right about it. And a tonfa to the face shortly thereafter, but that comes as a complimentary when you ask Hibari anything about the indigho-haired illusionist. Especially questions that directly stated or indirectly implied if he was banging the other.

And God, were there things right with it. There were so many things right with it that Hibari couldn't even think about them without his breath hitching and blood rushing to certain parts of him.

...I was talking about his cheeks. Get your mind out of the gutter, pervert.

For example, how it felt so right and soft between his fingers on the (daily , but Hibari refused to admit that to himself) occasions where he slipped in the other male's room while Mukuro was sleeping, silently stroking his hair and standing guard in case the sleeping male had one of the nightmares that plagued him every so often, and which he never told anyone about, but Hibari knew all about all the same.

Of course, he always took care to leave before the other woke up.

And how perfect and just right it felt clutched between his fingers when they kissed.

And how right it was to drag his slender fingers through when the illusionist was on his knees, soft mouth enveloping him-

Damn. He did _not_ need to get hard right now! People were still up and about, and he refused to let anyone see him with his mortal enemy.

That, and the fact that the pineapple wasn't talking to him. Due to, you know, the whole thing about him charging into the other's room, grabbing his ponytail and slicing it off.

With the spikes on his tonfas.

_Ouch._

But it really wasn't his fault!

He just couldn't stand it when he saw Byakuran doing ... _that_.

_"Mukuro-kun~ What a nice surprise meeting you~ I missed you, you were such an interesting person~"_

_Everyone stared. Mukuro twitched._

_"Kufufu, so then I take it you make a habit of killing people who are interesting to you?" he paused for a moment, before smiling widely. "Oh, I mean trying to kill."_

_"D-don't start this, you two." Tsuna squeaked, reverting to his dame-Tsuna personality._

_"Only sometimes~ When they are as threatening as you~" Byakuran smiled back, all marshmallows and happiness._

_Mukuro's eyebrow stopped twitching and his smile became a tad less venomous. Notice the emphasis on the tad. Not that he was particularly hateful towards the Gesso, it was just that he was hateful towards pretty much the whole human race._

_"You are an entertaining person yourself."_

_The white-haired Gesso laughed._

_"Mukuro-kun's hair sure is shorter than I remember it. I almost didn't recognise you from the back~~" _

That wasn't what aggravated Hibari.

What annoyed him was that Mukuro had started growing it out after that.

(Though in all honesty, Mukuro had been growing it out from way before then. But you know what they say, jealousy -cough,_ love _is blind.)

And it had seemed to him that Byakuran had started visiting more and more after that little incident.

( Well, what would you expect? He was forming an alliance with the Vongola. Not that Hibari could be bothered about taking such things in consideration when he felt his lov - mortal enemy, was being threatened by someone other than him, even if any half-witted person could tell it was completely baseless.)

So after the fifth visit in the month, he decided on the above-mentioned course of action,

Charging in Mukuro's room and ...

Hibari groaned inwardly as he remembered the mess, a teary-eyed Mukuro ( almost, because Rokudou Mukuro did not cry, damn it, not even over spilt blood - err, cut hair.) screaming things in Italian, Japanese, English, and a bunch of other languages - some of which sounded like they belonged to a civilisation older than Mukuro had any right to know about - and spewing curses left and right as Chrome and M.M. cradled him in their arms ( _'Too close.'_ Hibari's mind growled not too helpfully.) and Chikusa and Gokduera holding back Ken from attacking him, the silverette telling him what a big idiot he was, also in Japanese and Italian (What was it with bilingualism?).

"Kyo-san? Are you alright?"

_I would be fine if I had had any hopes left of ever getting laid again._

**A/N: How was it? I know, lame ending, lame fic. But it sounded so funny in my head... (its a weird place in there, lol.)**

**Review? Pwease? -stares with puppy eyes-**

**Mukuro- Bani~ you did **_**what**_** to my hair?**

**Hibari: I liked his hair that way, herbivore. Also, I'm not getting laid?**

**Me: -gulps- Ermmmm...**

**M.M.: -comes charging in- YOU DID WHAT TO MY MUKURO-CHAN YOU -censored-**

**Chrome: S-sorry, but I'm afraid I'll have to punish you, Bani-chan. **

**Me: C-chrome? Just tell Hibari to bite me to death~3 3**

**Hibari: Gladly, herbivore.**

**Me: Literally *_***

**Mukuro: ...Oya, what kind of a sick fetish is that?**

**Everyone else: -sweat drops-**

**Hibari: -proceeds to beat her up anyway-**

**If you want to see a pairing, tell me so. These are just short drabbles, so I'm willing to do pretty much all pairings - crack, rare pairings, pairings I don't usually do ... only no uke!Tsuna. I can't write an uke!Tsuna. He always turns into the HDW! or Boss!Tsuna somehow otlotlotlotl.**

**A-anyway, review?**


	2. Chapter 2

**A.N: Sorry for the half-assed FB format.**

**What? I was in a hurry! I'd forget it if I didn't hurry.**

**And then I got lazy...**

**Btw, the bolded names are because its supossed to represent tags, also, I'll write a proper 2759 and DS drabble too... someday soon, hopefully.**

**I'm sorry if Tsuna sounds OOC at the very last. In my defence, anyone would do that if they had a cute partner like Goku-chan /bomb'd/**

**Anyway,onto the story.**

**Pairings: DS, 2759.**

**Tsunayoshi Dame-Tsuna Sawada** is now **in a Relationship.**

27 Likes | 23 Comments|Like|Comment

**Reborn HitmanTutorExtraordinaire **: With your right hand, dame-tsuna?

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**Gokudera StormBomber Hayato :** Damn straight he is! As expected from Reborn-san, always so perceptive!

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**Reborn HitmanTutorExtraordinaire :** Of course.

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**Tsunayoshi Dame-Tsuna Sawada :** HIEEEEE REBOORN!

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**Tsunayoshi Dame-Tsuna Sawada :** That's not what he meant Hayato ... -_-;

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**Reborn HitmanTutorExtraordinaire :** What are you talking about, dame-Tsuna? Of course that was what I meant. -holds up Leon, transformed into a gun-

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**Yamamoto Takeshi : **Haha, I find it funny Gokudera said 'damn straight' while referring to the two of you.

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**Reborn HitmanTutorExtraordinaire :** ...-sweatdrops- And this is my student?

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**Tsunayoshi Dame-Tsuna Sawada :** Yamamoto! Ahhh I'll shut up Reborn don't shoot me!

1 Like|Like|Comment

**Gokudera StormBomber Hayato :** I've accomplished my mission, Jyuudaime!

43 Likes|Like|Comment

**Tsunayoshi Dame-Tsuna Sawada :** What mission? I don't remember giving you a mission...

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**Gokudera StormBomber Hayato :** Blowing the baseball idiot who was making the Tenth feel uncomfortable, of course!

108 Likes|Like|Comment

**Reborn HitmanTutorExtraordinaire :** ...I can't shoot you through Facebook.

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**Dino BuckingBronco Cavallone : **Congrats Tsuna! I knew you'd turn out to be like your big brother**! Squalo** you owe me now. And you're **Reborn**, you can do anything -.-;;;;

85 Likes|Like|Comment

**Superbia Sharkie Squalo :** VOIIIII! WHEN DID I BET WITH YOU YOU MISERABLE WHELP!

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**Dino BuckingBronco Cavallone :** When you said no funtimes for three months if I didn't shut up about things that existed in my delusional mind. Make it up to me now ; )

601 Likes|Like|Comment

**Superbia Sharkie Squalo :** I WAS REFERRING TO THIS STUPID DELUSION YOU HAD OF FUN TIMES BETWEEN US BRONCO! I'M GONNA WHIP YOUR ASS TO MOON.

97 Likes|Like|Comment

**Dino BuckingBronco Cavallone : **Kinky ;D

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**Gokudera StormBomber Hayato :** YOU TWO! Stop having this conversation on the poor Tenth's wall! As expected from the Tenth, you have so many comments and likes!

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**Tsunayoshi Dame-Tsuna Sawada :** Ah, **Gokudera**-kun~ This gives me ideas~ How would you like to come over to my house~ Like, right now? Thanks,** Dino**-san.

61 Likes|Like|Comment

**Dino BuckingBronco Cavallone : **Glad to help! Have fun xD

34 Likes|Like|Comment

**Superbia Sharkie Squalo :** VOIIIIIIII, YOU PERVERTS! STOP MAKING ME A PART OF THIS CONVERSATION!

92 Likes|Like|Comment

**A/N: If you want to see a pairing, tell me so. These are just short drabbles, so I'm willing to do pretty much all pairings - crack, rare pairings, pairings I don't usually do ... only no uke!Tsuna. I can't write an uke!Tsuna. He always turns into the HDW! or Boss!Tsuna somehow otlotlotlotl.**

**Review? :3**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: I'm sorry, I'm sorry. This happens to be one of my, as Algorithmic Paradox of Love so nicely and aptly put it, 'weird fetishes'. xD**

**And I'm sorry again for the use of extremely cliched plot device, but this just struck me and wouldn't go away. In the middle of class. What kind of school has advanced classes at 7.30 in the evening anyway? Well, we had a sweet lil storm so it was more or less worth it. Inclining towards the 'less'.**

**This crappy drabble is dedicated to Algorithmic Paradox of Love, who shares my weird fetish, and requested this drabble in the first place, and who I strongly suspect might be my twin. Except she's probably from a different continent and of a different age and different ethnicity, but still.**

**Pairings: 18 - 69 - 27, Hibari - Mukuro - Tsuna. **

**Warnings: Implications~ They are taking over the world!**

**In Which There Are Two Perverts, And Mukuro Isn't One**

****An audible _snap_, followed by an even more audible _crunch_ diverted Tsuna's attention to the raven haired Prefect sitting on the park bench opposite to them.

Err, Mukuro. He was kind of hidden behind a conveniently placed tree, watching Mukuro.

It was Reborn and his stupid homework, alright! After Hibari, it was apparently time to watch Mukuro.

Although this task was certainly much more enjoyable and easier on the eyes than the last one, a fact which may or may not have anything to do with the little crush Tsuna had on the illusionist.

Anyway, what was Hibari-san doing here in the first place? Tsuna was pretty sure a park teeming with vendors and children playing counted as a herbivore crowding ground. Was he here to bite some people to death?

If his death aura was something to go by, that would definitely be it. Tsuna gulped.

Mukuro went on doing what he was doing before the Prefect - or Tsuna, for that matter - had arrived.

Licking the melting vanilla ice cream in his hand.

**Very, very slowly.**

****Hibari's aura only grew worse and worse as Mukuro took to making little happy noises at the back of his throat. Sometimes the Disciplinary Committee Chairman wondered if the bluenette was doing this on purpose.

And then he looked at the way the bluenette was completely ignoring his presence and seemed to be engrossed completely in a world of his own, and mentally facepalmed.

Idiot herbivore.

He wondered if Mukuro would notice if he knocked the other out with his tonfas and dragged him back somewhere ... more private.

Yes, he definitely would.

Slurp, slurp, little moaning noise, lick, slurp, lick...

Mukuro stared bemusedly at the tonfa on the ground, splattered with his poor ice cream scoop, the empty cone still in his hands. He then turned to stare accusatorily at Hibari, who had remains of his own ice cream cone clutched in his hands.

"Oya, couldn't you have waited till I finished my ice cream?"

Without a word, Hibari threw the other tonfa at him.

Mukuro dodged.

"Why are you having a vanilla ice cream, herbivore?"

"Because there isn't any chocolate." the other replied.

"...I will bite you to death for corrupting the public morals of Namimori."

* * *

><p>Omake 1: Tsuna went red to the roots of his hair.<p>

S-so.

This was the reason after Hibari's killer aura?

"I CAN NEVER LOOK AT AN ICE CREAM CONE THE SAME WAY AGAIN!"

* * *

><p>Omake 2: Gathering up his courage and walking to Mukuro, Tsuna handed him a bar of chocolate.<p>

"You like chocolate, right?" he mumbled nervously when Mukuro fixed him with a surprised gaze.

Hibari glowered as the illusionist promptly "Kufufufu"-ed and began to assault the chocolate.

By licking it and letting it melt over his fingers as he licked each of them clean.

* * *

><p>Omake 3: "Hmmm, maybe I should buy the herbivore an ice cream someday again." Hibari voiced contemplatively to Hibird, safely out of hearing distance of pineapples and tuna fishes.<p> 


	4. Chapter 4

**A.N: -le gasp- Two chapters in such a short time? What is this? A miracle?**

**Well, I got to thinking about the 2718 dynamic, and happened to remember this comic strip I came across ages ago. Its not 1827, not even if you squint, but the basic idea is the same. I can't find it anymore, but I've recounted the story at the end of the chapter (since it would spoil everything if I did it at the beginning ^^"")**

**So, anyway, this spouted. Its just mildly 2718/1827, and written at near abouts 1 am, so I'm sorry if this turns out to be a fail^^"" Also, apparently when it comes to Hibari, I have no problem keeping Tsuna in his default uke character. In fact, I can't seem to make them otherwise.**

**Requested by Jasmin Liertha. I know you wanted 2718, but I hope this will tide you over till I can figure out a way to make Tsuna more .. seme-ish with Hibari. Hopefully without the use of dying will. Hope you enjoy^^**

**Pairings: 182718, an omake implying Mukuro and Chrome playing Matchmaker between them /shot/ Alright, what? I'm allowed to be weird, this is crack!**

**In Which Tsuna is Useless. As Usual.**

"DAME-TSUNAAA!"

A scream resounded through the hallways of Nami Middle as the brunette in question stared incredulously at the small Bovino child as he ran down the corridor at a break neck pace, heading straight towards him.

Cue the inevitable and unavoidable crash, as both went down in a flurry of pink grenades and yelps and whines.

After the usual complaints of 'why are you even here's from Tsuna ( which Lambo ignored - as usual) and around five seconds of being subjected to Gokudera's shakes and rants and a full-on glare that could have melted the freaking North Pole ( along with a few 'calm down's by Yamamoto, but no one paid attention to the poor guy anyway ) Lambo finally stopped showering the student body of Namiori Middle School with grenades and laughed his signature laugh.

Tsuna decided he would take grenades over that obnoxiously annoying laugh any day.

"Lambo-san saw Mama pack you chocolates. Gimme chocolates Tsuna. Gimme gimme gimme gimme gimme."

"Ehhh? But that's for- "

"Gimme chocolates or Lambo-san will blow you up. Gyahahaha."

"HIEEE! Don't toss those around! Fine!" Tsuna thrust one of his meticulously wrapped chocolates towards him before Gokudera could finally lose what little cool he was still retaining ( not much, and it was taking him quite a lot of effort, Tsuna could tell) and blow Lambo up.

* * *

><p>It was halfway into the break when I-Pin approached him.<p>

"Tsuna-san. Give I-Pin some too?"

It took Tsuna approximately ten seconds to realise what she was talking about, and he reluctantly parted with another one - how could one resist that face?

* * *

><p>"Herbivore, g-"<p>

"HIEEEE HIBARI-SAN! Take all you want but please DON'T BITE ME TO DEATH!"

With that, Tsuna threw the whole box of chocolates towards the Prefect and jumped out of the nearest window.

From the second floor.

...

Hibari stared. And stared some more.

" -o out with me." he finished his sentence bemusedly.

* * *

><p>Omake 1: "At least I managed to give Hibari-san the chocolates I stayed up all night making for him..." Tsuna whimpered from the ground.<p>

* * *

><p>Omake 2: "I can't believe Boss was the one who confessed first." Chrome commented.<p>

"Kufufufu, I always Tsunayoshi had it in him." Mukuro replied gleefully. "Well, at least I get chocolates for playing match maker."

"**Rokudou Mukuro**! What have you done with the chocolates that herbivore made for me? I shall bite you to death!"

_Oh shit_ was the unanimous reaction.

**A/N: Tha last Omake wasn't actually in there when I first wrote this, but Mukuro somehow wiggled himself and Chrome in ^^""**

**Alright, so the comics ran somewhat like this (not completely accurate wordings, but the gist is the same.)**

**Its Halloween.**

**1st Panel: Lambo at Tsuna's door. "Trick or treat!" Gets a candy.**

**2nd Panel: I-Pin at Tsuna's door, "Trick or treat." Gets a candy.**

**3rd Panel: **Hibari at Tsuna's door. "T-". Tsuna dumps the whole bag of candies on him.****

****4th Panel: "-hese lights are against the fire safety rules of Namimori (or something thereabouts)".****

**If you want to see a pairing, tell me so. These are just short drabbles, so I'm willing to do pretty much all pairings - crack, rare pairings, pairings I don't usually do ... only no uke!Tsuna. I can't write an uke!Tsuna. He always turns into the HDW! or Boss!Tsuna somehow otlotlotlotl.**

**Review? :3**


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: Right. I have nothing to say.**

**Except that I fail at room measurements so I took my own and put it in as Enma's.**

**Pairings: GiottoxGxEnma. (Don't kill me, alright! Please T^T) with a side of 2759 and very slight 33Hana (in the two-line omake.)**

**Requested By: (kind of.)Jasmin Liertha **

**I'm sorry! I just. I swear I was setting out to write a GxEnma but Giotto just ... popped out. -kicks Giotto- If you want, I'll do you a pure GxEnma as well, only you'll have to wait a lil bit longer.**

**In Which Enma Gets More Than He Bargained For.**

**(Oh wait, when the heck did he bargain for this anyway?)**

"Enma-kun!"

"Oi, you redhead."

Chocking in Tsuna's sudden ( and very uncharacteristical) hug - more like a death grip - Enma could already tell that this was going to be bad.

And yet, when Tsuna oh so innocently asked him if he could keep his and Gokudera's Vongola rings for a few minutes, he couldn't help but relent? What harm was it going to do anyway?

...he really, really should have known better.

Maybe it was the smirk on Gokudera's face, or maybe the immense relief and poorly-suppressed pity on Tsuna's, that alerted him first. But...

But but but.

One look at Tsuna-san's large, puppy eyes and he was lost, like the poor sucker he was.

* * *

><p>And thus, there was no one but himself to blame for his current predicament.<p>

"Wonder what they are doing now?" A fuming rosette paced frantically all around Enma's 15 by 35 feet room.

Enma wondered if it would be safe to tell them to at least take their shoes off. The tatami mat on his floor was kind of expensive.

"I wouldn't wonder. Maybe what we used to do. They are kind of like us, right?"

Giotto replied, thoughtfully gazing out of the window.

Enma decided he really, _really_ didn't want to know.

"What if they are attacked? How do they plan on defending themselve?"

"I'm sure Tsuna-kun has his dying will pills handy in case." Enma piped up.

Biggest. Mistake. of his entire. Freaking. Life.

Two head immediately swivelled towards him.

"I wonder why they gave the rings to him for safekeeping..." G wondered aloud.

"Oh, I don't know, probably so you couldn't butt in and give them pointers like last time, and I didn't have to shut you up ... physically." Giotto smiled.

...alright, you know what? Enma said he didn't _want_ to know!

"Che, I was just trying to help that ungrateful brat anyway! I mean, its not like you would know how much it hurts the first time." G glared at Giotto.

Enma wondered, not for the first time in the night, much less his life, what wrong he had done to God in Heaven above that he was being made to suffer like this.

Giotto looked like he was going to retort, smirking like the Cheshire Cat and Devil Incarnate's hybrid, so Enma decided to interfere. In his best boss-like voice, he broke in.

"You two. I'm trying to sleep here."

Which still sounded little better than a squeak, but he tried his best!

Uh-oh.

Ah shit.

He forgot this was the Vongola Primo and his right-hand man he was talking about.

Eyeing him contemplatively, Giotto suddenly smiled.

Enma didn't like the looks of it.

Jumping out of his bed, he made a run for the door. The window. Anything that could provide a potential exit.

"Oh no you don't."

G grabbed him easily, before looking up at Giotto.

"He is a lot like Cozart."

"And Tsuna and Hayato are just like us."

G nodded.

"So do you think...?"

Giotto nodded solemnly.

"Might be."

"In that case ..." G smiled for the first time.

Not as evil as Giotto's, but definitely not good.

"Yes, we better prepare him for the future."

...

And that's how Enma ended up with a limp and a solemn promise to never ever 'babysit' the two Vongola's rings again.

...

At least not on school-nights.

* * *

><p>Omake 1: "EXTREEEEEME!" Knuckle and Ryohei shouted together.<p>

Hana, still a little dazed from her first ( extreme, her mind automatically provided - which just went to show what an obscene amount of time she was hanging around the other ) kiss, just sighed.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: /shot/ Eeek, I'm horrible and going to hell.**

**Oh well, at least the ride is fun xD**

**Am I the only one who finds it funny that Hana, who's always saying she wants someone mature and adult, ends up with Ryohei, who is anything but? xDD Not that I'm complaining, I love the two of them (one of the only canon hetero couples I love. I usually shy away from non-genderbend het 'cos the women are almost always portrayed as weak and make me want to strangle them. Sheesh, seriously!)****. **

**As usual, you can always send in drabble requests. However, you'll probably have to wait an insane amount of time till I get to it, since I'm currently working on** AlaudexDaemonxPrimo,** Verde27 drabble and oneshot (because I couldn't get fluff in a cracky drabble otl), an 1859 drabble and -draws in breath- 27186980100. Not in that order, 'cos the order is just confusing.**

**This was just to let you know the order of priorities, since I want to give pairings that haven't been covered and people whose requests I haven't filled yet a chance too ^^''**


	6. Chapter 6

**A.N: So, when I'm supposed to be doing my homework on the pairings already requested, I was taking this KHR quiz. You know, the one where you list 10 characters and fill in the answers to questions?**

**One of the questions was : "You go the cinema, and see Squalo sitting on your seat. What do you do?" And that prompted this drabble xD**

**Matchmaker!Mukuro makes another appearance /slapped/ but there's a reason behind it this time! And this is more of an oneshot than a drabble, and not that cracky.**

**EDIT: My PC got trashed and all the drabbles and stuff I wrote went outta the window... I'm working on rewriting everything but its not really very easy... its so frustrating.**

**Pairings: Main DS, a little 1869.**

**In Which Mukuro Decides To Stick To Un-Matchmaking Things**

Rokudou Mukuro was many things, but an abstinent he was not. Especially when the object of his (rather improper) affection was lying within easy reach.

"Hey, Kyoya?"

No answer.

"Kyoya."

Still no answer.

"KYOYA! WAKE UP!"

Mukuro pouted, he didn't like Hibari ignoring him. It wasn't like they got much time together, anyway. Which made it all the more precious, and he wasn't about to let Hibari sleep through this extra precious time he had managed to scrounge together through a series of careful manipulations.

(He had had to send Chrome and Ken on a date - without telling them it was a date, of course- , and somehow pass M.M. off into poor, poor Chikusa's hands. Mukuro was pretty sure Chikusa was going to rebel and run away one of these days. M.M. was not an easy person to tole - be with, especially in long doses. Not everyone was lucky like Hibari, who only had to glare at Kusakabe to make the man realise he had better get the hell away from the raven.)

"Hnn."

"Oya, is that all you say to your lover?" Mukuro twitched a little, but kept the smile on his face.

Who he hadn't met up with in more than a month, mind you. But he wasn't about to say that out loud. It made him sound desperate. Rokudou Mukuro wasn't desperate.

No answer.

Mukuro glared at the other boy's sleeping figure.

How. Dare. He!

Alright, this was getting out of hand.

"YOU! Wake the **fuck** up or I swear I'll leave this moment!" He snapped, smile slipping off. There weren't many things that could make Mukuro angry. His lover falling asleep on him was one of those rare things.

"Hnnn." With that, Hibari woke up and glared back at him.

"What do you want me to do, herbivore? The Bucking Bronco was keeping me up all night."

"You cheated on me?" Mukuro blinked, brilliant evil mastermind or not, he couldn't wrap his mind around this idea. "You _cheated_ on me? You _cheated_ on _me_?"

Did he have a death wish or what?

To his immense relief though, Hibari (not so) lovingly smacked him upside the head with a tonfa. He could tell it was a loving smack because it didn't knock him out flat.

"He kept on whining about Squalo all night."

This was an interesting development.

"Really? What did Squalo do?"

"Came into his life. The herbivore was spouting ridiculous things about him. Something about him being a pretty princess and the Bronco being his Prince."

Mukuro suppressed a snigger. If Squalo heard that, the Bronco would be sharkfood.

Then he realised the gravity of the situation and swore softly.

"So as long as the Bronco doesn't get Squalo, he's going to mess up _our_ lives as well?"

* * *

><p><strong>TAKE ONE<strong>

Walking into the theatre, Squalo stared at the man sitting in the seat beside him, double-checking his own seat number, and pinching himself to make sure this was real.

Although to be accurate, Xanxus wasn't exactly occupying the seat beside his. He was sitting in his throne-like chair, which had somehow taken the place of the standard seats in the theatre. Squalo decided to not think how Xanxus managed to achieve this feat and decided to go for a subtler greeting.

"VOIIIII, what are you doing here, trashy Boss?"

Which wasn't really all that subtle. But this is Squalo we are talking about, so that's not surprising.

Xanxus opened one red eye fully, before snorting. "Trash." he acknowledged.

"Voi, I said what are you doing here? And who are you calling trash, you damned man?" Squalo added, almost as an afterthought.

Maybe, it had been Xanxus who had sent him the ticket?

...

Hah, as if!

Just when he was beginning to think the man had fallen asleep, Xanxus replied.

"When I woke up this morning -" More like afternoon, Squalo thought bitchily - "-there was a crate of wine in my room with this ticket on it. I decided I could do this one favour, if its for all that expensive wine."

Really? the sileverette stared at Xanxus in disbelief.

"..."

"..."

"VOI, ARE YOU SAYING ALL THIS TIME, ALL I HAD TO DO TO GET YOU TO DO THE PAPERWORK WAS BRIBE YOU WITH WINE?"

"...shut up, trash."

"VOI!"

"...it wouldn't have worked."

"WHY THE FUCK NOT?!"

",,,,,,,because I like torturing you."

And if Squalo flipped off and destroyed half the theater after that, who can really blame him?

...

(But Mukuro did, all the same. Because Hibari blamed him - quite vocally, with one - or a dozen - tonfa hits thrown in,)

* * *

><p><strong>AN: There's gonna be a Part Two here. The intro's written already but I'm too lazy to finish it right now and I figured I'd at least publish this. I'm working on rewriting all the requests I haven't filled yet. Would you mind repeating the ones I haven't filled? I'm terribly behind on everything... ^^;;**


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